Keep it to myself

I wouldn't want to wish it upon anyone; my MS diagnosis was not what I wanted to hear years and years ago, but I remind myself often that it is a manageable disease and there are A LOT WORSE conditions out there. Still, it lives in my nerves, on my brain and in my spinal column. It tingles when I tip my head forward. It reminds me to take better care of myself and get my rest.

Truth be told, I hadn't missed it AT ALL during my pregnancy. In fact, it was rather nice to feel "normal" again.

I would like to believe that I have a pinched nerve in my upper back/left shoulder, but it is likely the MS... plaguing me, yet again.... this time, in this new location. (It has started acting up more and more. Granted, lugging a 16 pound baby around in a 6 pound car seat... or even a 24 pound toddler doesn't really help much, I'd guess. Weeks of hot, humid weather does NOT help either, I'm afraid.) I am thankful that it (MS) has left my vision alone post-pregnancy and remain hopeful that it continues to leave my eyes alone.

I'll just take things one day at a time... hoping to hold off taking medicine again for as long as possible so that I can offer my baby the best gift I can... breast milk!

Perhaps a massage would feel lovely. I'll have to put that on my WISH LIST, right next to finding a little time for MYSELF.

• • • • •

Dear Body,

Please STOP causing self-inflicted injuries upon us by refraining from chewing the protective coating off of my nerves and using my brain as a snack. I will TRY to take better care of you and eventually, hope to find some time for exercise - other than chasing after an active two year old. I would appreciate if you would leave my vision alone as well. Thanks for understanding that I want MY BODY BACK!

Sincerely,

Me