His SECRET PROJECT is driving me CRAZY!

So, when you are a kid – on a long car trip – sitting next to your sibling, you tend to purposely poke and prod at each other because you know that it drives them nuts. I remember my brother sitting next to me, with his finger pointed just inches away from my face as he announced "I'm not touching you...."

Come on, unless you are an only child, you've been there, too.

Well, my boyfriend is working on a SECRET PROJECT and it is starting to drive me nuts. He brings it up and has managed to leave out pieces of evidence a few times now. The great part of it is that he knows it is driving me nuts, which is making it all-together more fun for him now.

Last Saturday, I worked in the afternoon. I was suprised that he had announced that he was going shopping. I had offered to give him directions to bookstores, car dealerships, etc. I had even offered him a Metro map of the area. He informed me that he didn't need the map because he knew exactly where he had to go. (Funny thing being that a few days later, I discover that he willingly did take the Metro map with him, despite the voiced objections.)

So, he's not much of a shopper. He is strictly business: In & Out. Get it done.

Oddly enough, he announced that he was going shopping after work on Monday as well.

Saturday, I came home to find a bottle of Elmer's glue in the bathroom. Adhesive tape runners had exploded on the desk in my office. A bag of balloons had been left out. A plastic bag from Joann Fabrics, as well as a bag from WalMart were both left in the room.

I asked him what he had been doing. He informed me that he was working on a SECRET PROJECT.

When I saw the bag of balloons, I announced "Hey, you left evidence of your secret project in the office."

He asked "What did I leave? The string in the garbage can?"

I said "No, a bag of balloons on the desk."

"Yep, yep, yep. Used balloons for the secret project. And some string too."

"What are you making?" I asked.

"Can't tell you." he said. "It's a secret."

My mother had informed him that his secret project is driving me nuts. Funny thing, he uses that to his advantage because a few days later, I discovered a piece of fabric left on my desk.

"What do you call this?" I asked.

He grabs it from my hand, sports an eyebrow wiggle, flashes a huge grin and walks away. "Oops, I thought I had cleaned up after myself." he said. " That must be from my secret project."

I've tried to con it out of him, but he won't budge.

He randomly asks me "Hey, can you keep a secret?"

I say "Yeah." and I get all excited – thinking he will tell me about this secret project.

That's when he hits me with "Yep. I can too."

Twice this week, the SECRET PROJECT has turned up in my dreams. He laughed when I told him. "You poor, poor thing" he says each time I ask about it.

He finally told me to just forget about it and get it out of my head. Then, I check my email an hour or so later to find this:

SECRET PROJECT
Secret Project
secret project

OOPS, SORRY TO HAVE BROUGHT IT UP
my fault


After suffering from a cold for most of the week now, he asked me yesterday "What's worse... your cold or the secret project?"

"It doesn't really matter. I can't seem to get either one of them out of my head."

After the sassy email, I made a new desktop for my computer:


Today, he announced "Girl, this is going to be great fun since your birthday isn't for another two months. If I knew it was going to drive you this crazy, I would have started my secret project a long time ago."

Nice. Whatever have I gotten myself into?

Then, tonight, he informs me that he is keeeping a mailing tube for his SECOND secret project.

Oh, brother.... here we go again!